Lindsey Lohan

Is it just me, or Paige Ashley looking stunningly like Lindsey Lohan these days?! In this episode of Favourite Fucks, she’s getting a good dicking from Clarke Kent. Deliciously ironic now that good old Lindz is a muff diver! I love watching girls eat pussy, but ever since an old girlfriend forced me to watch Mean Girls I have harboured fantasties about shafting la Lohan. I dunno, maybe it was the Tina Fey script but I actually managed to sit through a chick-flick without the usual flood of chick-flick hate I get! Haha, no, it was definitely Lindsey Lohan in short skirts that did it!

Sexy Satine

I’ve been following the blossoming career of our little teenaged Satine Spark with interest ever since she exploded on the blog scene, and I can’t wait until she actually explodes onto our television screens!
I was reading the blog by ChristianXXX (of Busty Brits fame) and on it, he compared cute Satine to Sasha Grey! Now, that is high praise from an American. Especially one who’s been in the industry so long. Here’s what he says about her on his blog:
“Satine was an unbelievably good performer, so good in fact, that she honestly reminded me of Sasha Grey when I saw her first scene for The Fashionistas back in 2006. She loved getting fucked, she loved sucking cock, she made noises, kept her eyes open, she talked when directed to, and finally…..she took a cum shot to her glasses without batting an eye (literally). I can not rave about this girl enough. If she was a US citizen, she would work every day, much like Nicole Ray and Allyssa Hall are currently.”

If that’s not a good reason to keep your eyes peeled for this blonde spectacled student at every moment possible, I’m not sure what is!

Get in the festive spirit

Some people hate Christmas. I’m not one of them. Christmas is ace because people buy you stuff, you eat tonnes of food and there’s load of Christmas themed porn on telly. What could be better?!
So settle back and enjoy these two hardcore Christmas themed pornos from Christmases past. We’ve got Fetish Whores Merry Xmas and everyone’s favourite filth-monger Donna Marie and her rather unique Xmas Experience.

We Love Cathy

I know I’ve been writing about Cathy Barry quite a lot lately but it’s only because Extreme Cougar really is that good. We’ve just uploaded the hardcore version of episode two and it’s proper good so it is (sorry slipped in west country there, always do when I’m thinking about Cathy!).
Cathy’s out for a countryside stroll, resplendent in tight white dress and tottering high heels when a cyclist, riding past can’t stop ogling Cathy’s buxom busom, so much so that’s falls off his bloody bike. Poor lamb has grazed his shin, so Cathy being the good MILF that she is, whisks him back to the Barry manor for a ride he literally can’t fall off of!!

Avalon sucks good cock

For those that haven’t heard of it before, Vice magazine is a free magazine that is distributed around the world. It’s for the ‘cool’ kids. You know that TV show Nathan Barley? That’s Vice in a nutshell.
So I was at my mate’s house the other night and I saw an issue of Vice on the table. I picked it up and had a flick through and came across an article entitled “Gays or Girls: slobbing the knob for science”. The journalist that wrote this article basically put together a blow-job pepsi challenge: who sucks better cock girls or gays. Or as they put it “Do we have to go gay to get the best head?”
So I’m sat there reading this article, thinking hmm interesting premise. And lo and behold who do you think is one of the suckers in this challenge but sexy porn star Avalon!

Anyway check out this article if you’ve got a mo, as it’s rather interesting. Obviously, Avalon wins by a country mile. And then see her in action sucking cock in Peep Show: Avalon.

Robyn Truelove wants it up the wrong’un

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Limited Edition: Extreme Cougar wrapping paper

Being a massive fan of Cathy Barry’s new series ‘Extreme Cougar’, and what with it being my mate’s birthday today I have decided to be a bit creative on my lunchbreak today. I have actually managed to make some Cathy Barry wrapping paper to wrap up the present I got him! What with it being Christmas coming up that give me a damn good idea for another use for those festive Callgirls pictures now!!

Television X for the win!

Phew, last night was an absolute riot! We won an award, which was fantastic. We won Best Pay Per View, which was really cool to be recognized for. I spent ages sitting with Jay Snake and his missus Claudia Rossi and so naturally cheered my little mole voice off when Jay won Best Male Performer! I ended up sitting next to busty Starr during dinner and she looked seriously hot in her slinky blue dress.
The UKAFTAs are a pretty schmoozy event so I hung out with the Pumpkin crew for a bit, got a good eyeful of Cathy Barry’s tits! Spent a bit of time with Ben Dover and Syren Sexton who was looking absolutely gorgeous in her red satin dress. That girl gives me more than one of my eleven a day*!



Last night was full of adventures. I got to hand out with Linsey Dawn McKenzie and the goth girls from The Satanic Sluts which was a whole lot of fun. I did get to do a bit of mingling too. I bumped into my friend Katie K who was looking sexy as ever, the smoking hot sex kitten Lala and Marino who won the Lifetimer award. And oh my word, Renee Richards won an award and she looked seriously gorgeous in her black dress with the little “RR” on it!

Thanks to all the organisers for making it such a special night. I can’t wait until next year!

Are Chav’s Sexy?

Well, I wouldn’t normally say yes to this question, but looking at these pictures of Alysha Leigh in upcoming show Council Estate Skanks, I am rather tempted to stand up and say “Yeh, chavs can be sexy”.
Alysha’s dressed like a typical chav, Croydon facelift, gold hoop earrings, tiny little tracksuit and to top it all off she’s snogging (the only word to describe what she’s doing!) Stefan Hard whilst smoking what is undoubtably a lambert & butler fag. Unfortunately, she’s not wearing a kappa tracksuit but I wouldn’t be surprised if she had just got home from Iceland when Stefan pounced on her.
Stefan gets her out of her yellow tracksuit quick sharpish and Alysha’s got a pretty good body. Nice natural tits, tanned body and quite slim too. He fingers her, licks her out, fucks her in all sorts of naughty positions before he cums in her mouth. See, this is how you have to treat chavettes; it’s not so much a ‘treat ‘em mean, keep ‘em keen’ type of affair, more take charge and pound them senseless before they get a chance to open their mouths!
This show looks superb and will begin airing on televisionX, Sky channel 903 next month. I will obviously be giving you guys more news as and when I know but here’s a few exciting images to leave you with.

Got Milk?

Cum moustaches are great. A thousand times better than milk ones. Obviously you’d only want to see it on a girl, but to be fair, I only ever want to see milk moustaches on girls anyway. I guess you have to aim right when you’re giving a lass a facial and it’s not really the sort of time when aim is at it’s best. Well, not for me at any rate!
Well this naughty picture is taken from brand new show Different Strokes. Being the mole at televisionX I do love bringing you the goss before anyone else and I’m hear to tell you that this is Suzie Best covered in she-male spunk! This new series follows the motto “different strokes for different folks” and features not only she-males but bdsm, t-girls, grown men in nappies and so much more! Each episode features one of regular hot pornstars with a little added quirk! I know this show is going to divide opinions but that’s kinda the point isn’t it. And, when it boils down to it, you can’t fault a show that’s got a cum moustache!

Tattoos in rude places

As you guys all know, I do quite like girls with tattoos. Not all of them mind, I genuinely don’t think they should all have them, but I do like the variety of having some girls with them. Which is why I’m loving the new episode of Jim Slip’s Coast to Coast that’s just been uploaded. Jim gets to meet Sasha who has tattoos just above her lady bits! A girl’s gotta have a shaven snatch for that sort of body art! That’s probably why I like it so much. Because I know she has to maintain her undergrowth to stop it from looking weird. See, it’s these type of things which keep our girlies looking top-notch.
Jim knows the type of seaside girls who like it hardest and soon enough Sasha is bouncing her pierced, shaven and tattooed slit (oh, the porn trinity!) all over Jim’s pervy cock. She even gives him a tit-wank and it’s brilliant to see a lass so good at it that she can suck it off at the same time!! I hope I get to see Sasha in a lot more stuff ‘cos she’s young, hot, blonde, and I loved watching her get pounded by Jim so much that I can’t wait to see what happens when she lets someone like Jay Snake have a go!

Charlie Britton Exposed

Tonight is the repeat of Charlie Britton Exposed. For those who missed it, tune in to sky channel 903 to watch Ben Dover, the notorious pornographer playing Charlie Britton, the, yep you guess it, the notorious pornographer! He bangs Shay Hendrix completely senseless in this episode, and she’s such a fittie! I love this show. Honestly, watch it, it’s steamy-as-you-like!

Autumn Naughtiness

I love spilling the beans on all the latest televisionX gossip so I thought I’d let you know what new shows are coming up next month. We’ve got new series of Blindfold, Lara’s UK Swingers, and, as I mentioned yesterday, Party Animals.
But, we have some brand new series coming up to! The first one you’ll get to see is Different Strokes. Now I don’t want to give too much away on this one as I might get the boot and we can’t have that now can we! After that is Council Estate Skanks which, let’s be fair, is somewhat a self-explanatory title! Lastly, we have Katie K’s Teen Rampage where (and I heard this from the hottie herself!) Katie goes about deflowering lesbian virgins. Wahey!
As always, more on this later…

Skint and Broken: perfect for a weekend of tvx orgies

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Small but sexy

Sexy but small Jools stars in tonight’s episode of Jobs For The Boys. I’ve been a fan of hers since I saw her debut in Whatever She Wants and I decided to follow her career avidly since then. She’s only wee and Jay Snake (all 9.5” of him) is pounding her like mad in this show! Being the trouper that she is she’s bouncing all over the place and you can tell she’s seriously into it. Actually, I would say it’s one of the realest and most passionate scenes I have ever seen in porn! And I have seen A LOT of porn! Even Jay himself says “I had great chemistry with Jools, it was her first time and her reactions were very natural, she just kept cuming!”

I almost didn’t recognize her in this episode of Jobs For The Boys as she was wearing a very long brunette wig. She’s a Hollywood actress from the ‘50s who’s desperate to have a go on her co-star’s cock. Even her mouth is small but she manages to accommodate Clarke’s lengthy shaft down the back of her throat. This episode is amazing, and I’m really enjoying this series so far! Tune in at 10pm tonight on televisionX so you can see Jools get her brains fucked out.

televisionX.co.uk site updates!

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Lolly B gets a good hard dicking

Praise be the lord! The thing every man who’s ever seen a british porno in the last few years has been waiting for has finally happened. Lolly Badcock has had a cock inside her. And what a lucky bloke he is too! It’s refreshing to see someone else take charge of Lolly, and for the person to be a guy is even better. She’s screaming obscenities all the way through like “I FUCKING LOVE IT HARD” and boy oh boy does she! He even manages to get his whole fist in her and Tequila Woods gets the syringe out, gives Miss Badcock an enema and she has such control over her sphincter that she can squeeze all the water out like a her bum is a water pistol! You absolutely have to watch this video as it has to be seen to be believed!

Hairy or not?

Beef curtains are a little bit like, well, beef. Some days you fancy it as steak, some days you fancy a burger. Doesn’t mean one is better than the other. Same goes for hairy vs shaven. Some days I love the groomed look, some days only a bare flange will do and other days, like today I like to imagine picking bits of fur out of my teeth.
And there’s no-one I’d rather get a mouthful of than Daria Glower. She’s what one might call a “fittie”. Having a hairy minge is sort of like her thing really isn’t it, and all the better for it! She totally stands out in her refusal to go bare. Just know, love, that you look gorgeous being as natural as you are! Check her out in Bush Babes
getting pounded by JJ. She’s so hot, I just can’t watch this all the way through if you know what I mean!

Jim Slip’s Coast to Coast

Sundays are awesome aren’t they? Nothing happens so you get to catch up with everything you missed throughout the week. And tonight I’m catching up on Jim Slip’s Coast to Coast. I’ll be totally honest with you here (and god bless the anonymity of my mole guise) I’ve already seen this episode and well, I thought the girl in it was pretty unique looking. Now, I know I shouldn’t say that but hey, it’s personal opinion right? Everyone has different tastes and that’s one of my favourite things about televisionX: they actually do have girls to suit all tastes! I’ve flicked onto some of the other porn channels (strictly in the name of research, mind) and the girls look like carbon copies of each other. Massive inflated fake tits and blonde hair and extensions. Now some girls can pull this off and do it oh so well but these other channels just have the crap ones. Anyway, back to Jim Slip… Jim gets it y’know. Girls look nice when they’re not enhanced and Maisie is certainly au natural! Jim doesn’t discriminate. He bangs girls of all types. Watch the repeat tonight at 22:45pm only on televisionX. Little heads-up for you before I dash off to the pub: firstly this episode of Jim Slip features a bloody brilliant cream-pie (Jim=comedic genius) and secondly next week’s episode has Shay Hendrix in it. Yay!

Katie K

Katie K is only 19 but she’s already got a growing fanbase. Having been in Blonde Ambition with Michelle B, and more recently Nymphic Games with Loz Lorrimar, she’s got her very own show coming up on televisionX next month called Katie K’s Teen Rampage. I’ll be posting all about that soon mole fans! But check out her blog for news from the horse’s mouth.
This week I’ve had the immense pleasure of chatting to Katie K and she is just a doll. Smart, articulate and downright filthy-sexy. Yes, I fancy her, alright. You will too though, that’s the thing. You just can’t help fancying this girl. Check out this interview I did with her and you’ll see why she’s so fuckable!

What made you get into the adult industry?
I just wanted to have lesbian sex with a porn star I had my eye on! We ended up having the session, I loved it and got into it from there!

Does sex on screen affect your personal sex life?
It has made me soooo much more confident in bed and I am a lot more adventurous than I used to be! I used to be really shy!

What’s your favourite sex act?
Oral, without any question! I love giving and I am really good at it, but I love receiving too! I also love de-flowering lesbian virgins!

What are your favourite porn stars to have sex with & why?
Cate Harrington because she’s filthy! We are both really into each other too. Also Michelle B was great and Starr is amazing at oral!

Do you watch yourself have sex?
Yes I absolutely love watching my own films and programmes! It’s a really turn on for me actually!

How can you not love a girl like this?? In the episode of Planet Lolly that I wrote about yesterday, she is stood in front of Lolly Badcock telling her that she wants to be just like her and well, it looks like she’s on the right path for that one!

Planet Lolly

Everyone knows Lolly Badcock is a dirty perv, that goes without saying pretty much. Some might say she’s a bad influence on girls: encouraging them to be filthy sluts like her and corrupting fresh and innocent young minds. Other say she’s a role model and there are tones of girls who look up to her. In this new hardcore video Lolly is passed out in the park wearing nothing but a skimpy outfit when Katie K (in her cute little school uniform) stumbles across her and instantly recognizes her. Other than all the lesbian sex in this vid, my favourite bit is Lolly’s response: “If you know who I am, that means you watch porn…. And that means you WANK!”
Lolly makes Katie K strip in the park and leads her about by her school tie pass bewildered people and bewildered people in cars or taxis. She takes Katie back to her place and they have some pretty dirty sex, including letting a peeping tom in to watch and Lolly banging Katie with a strap-on. This is a great girl girl video. There’s just something about Katie’s milky-white slim body bouncing about on a seasoned pro like Lolly (I judge that by shoots not by age- Lolly B is really fit) that gets me rock solid.
I’m becoming quite the fan of Katie. This week I’ve actually had the extreme pleasure of talking to her and she’s such a lovely and incredibly dirty girl! But, more on that tomorrow…

Claudia Rossi

Claudia Rossi is smoking hot. That is a fact. I’ve met her as well. She was fit in real life too, and she had glasses on-very sexy! The only downside to her, and this is only a minor quibble, is that she’s going out with Jay Snake! Much as I like the guy I can’t help but feel a bit envious towards him.
A mole can dream though, so I know I’ll be staying in to watch Jobs For The Boys tonight. Admittedly, I already watched it in the office earlier but I haven’t got plans tonight and frankly it is just that good. Claudia’s got really nice natural tits; they look very biteable, if you know what I mean! She’s not wearing much either, just this skimpy and completely skin-tight pvc number. Mmm, sexy. It’s quite a short number so she gets it unzipped to show off her pert chest and then pushes the dress up so Clarke Kent can get his dick in her in all sorts of naughty positions. Personally, I prefer the bits when Claudia is all tied up, than when she’s dominating Clarke and I will definitely be thinking about having her all tied up for me when I watch it!

TVX Factor… Way better than it’s namesake!

I’m not a massive fan of reality shows. I actually think they suck balls. Luckily, TVX Factor literally sucks balls! There’s no cheesy presenter who’s face is plastered over every shit show on television; it’s just good ol’ Phil, Michelle Thorne (mmm) and that weird Chicken Man who, personally, am not that keen on. It’s just people who are either shit at fucking (norms) and people who are ace at fucking (pornstars). Basically, the norms aren’t bad per se at sex, it’s more they just don’t know what angles are good to show off their bodies, what faces look good on them when they cum, that sort of thing. Either that or they’re old, like the geezer Suzie Best nearly had to bang. Luckily this episode is pretty good. As soon as Louise comes out looking smoking in that polka dot dress, you know this is a good ‘un. Then, the good lord of porn smiled upon us and sent an angel in the shape of Danny Mountain to make this extra-good. He whaps his piece out and she has a good suck. They get down to it and her tits bounce in the most loveliest way. Check out Phil Barry’s face about half way through- the man is engrossed! Louise even climbs up on the judges desk so he can have a proper close-up look. Honestly, to my mind, this is the best one so far.

EXCLUSIVE: I chat with Danny Mountain!

Now those of you in the know are probably wondering how I got to have this little bit of face-time with Mr. Mountain and no, sadly I didn’t get a work outing to America [makes mental note of suggesting this to someone high up]. Thanks to time differences and the power of the internet, Danny took time out of his incredibly busy schedule to answer my questions!
Danny is quite a young chap and has already forged out quite the career for himself. Now settled in sunny LA, he is married to hot pornstar Eva Angelina and they’re expecting their first child! How’s that for a charmed bloody life! After we got the vital statistics out the way (much as it pains me to ask another guy how big his dick is, but the answer is 9”) we managed to down to some much tougher questions.
The guy is such a gent, when I asked him who his favourite pornstar to have sex with, he told me “My favorite girl to work with is obviously first off my wife Eva Angelina for many reasons!” I guess he kinda has to say that, and to be fair, he’s incredibly lucky that he can answer a question like that in such a way! After I leaned on him a bit he admitted that he’s good mates with Suzie Best and Yazmin as well, but shh! Don’t tell the missus!
Danny got into porn the way most young blokes dream of. He says “It just seemed like the perfect job and I took to it like a duck to water haha.” You can see why he took to it so well; those slightly bad-boy good-looks, an insatiable appetite for minge and a naturalness on camera which you know means he gets it. He’s there to fuck, basically. Off-screen he’s very personable, and his total adoration for his wife is very apparent. When I asked him what his favourite ever sex scene was he told me it was “when I met my wife working back in London last April”. I’m sure every girl who’s reading this is going “awww, I wanna sleep with him too now!” Well, you can’t. He lives in America and he’s married to a proper fit pornstar. However, you can watch his theme night this Friday on televisionX from 10:30pm onwards and wish you were one of the pornstars that got pounded by him!

Talk dirty to me…

I had a bit of an adventure last night. I know, I know, how very naughty of me to go out drinking on a school night. But, boy, am I glad I did! I went out in East London last night and I met this real firecracker in a proper cockney pub. Needless to say I lured her back to my bachelor pad as soon as they called last orders and had her knickers off faster than you can say “cum-guzzling slut”.
Now, a little confession: this was the first time I had sex in ages. Yes, I work in porn, but sadly that doesn’t mean I get to have sex as often as I watch it. So you can imagine it came as a bit of shock when this girl turned out to have the dirtiest mouth on her. She was coming out with all sorts of filth while I was banging her. I got right into it (as you do!) and I swear this girl would make an awesome pornstar considering some of the stuff she was coming out with. I know that we’re actually looking for new girls at the moment, and I did get this girl’s number but I’m wondering exactly how weird that would be to go from having shafted her up against my bedroom door to then being in a professional working relationship. Hmm, definitely one to think about.
In the mean time I think I’m just gonna settle back and watch a bit of sextalk Live tonight on televisionX 2. It’s encrypted which means not only will their language be filthy but what’s happening on screen will be too! Result! It’s on from midnight ‘til 2, so it’s a late one for me tonight and I’ll be hiding my yawns for another day running. Ah well, it’s worth it!

Porn Capital Contender: Bristol

A lot of people refer to Nottingham as the porn capital of the UK (personally, last time I was there I got spat on from a moving car outside Asda’s) but I think Bristol is fast over-taking. A lot of pornstars are basing themselves in the sunny south-west and now there’s this channel Four show ‘When Women Rule The World’ that’s got ex-pornstar Lianne Young in it, and guess where she hails from? That’s right, Bristol!
Some of you may remember her, she used to go under the name ‘Billy Britt’ a fair bit and she was basically a self-styled ‘Porn Queen of England’. This should bring Bristol some well-deserved attention in the porn industry!
I love Bristol and haven’t been in ages. I need to go and have a drink in the Apple Bar (a little boat that serves only cider!) and go have a wander up Park Street.
Speaking of which, check out this vid I found the other day that has Pascal wandering up and down Park Street looking for porn newbies in Dirty Debutantes. It’s got that Emily girl I blogged about the other day, from Naked City!

Mr. Mountain

I’ve had the extreme pleasure lately of being in contact with the awesome Danny Mountain and I’ve got to say he’s a top bloke! He’s got his own theme night next week which, even though he’s a dude, I’m pretty excited about. Don’t worry, Mole fans, I’m not batting for the other team now, it’s just he’s got to shag all my favourite TVX girls like Carmel, Michelle B, Sahara, and Suzie Best. He’s been telling me about his hot wife Eva Angelina and how they’re having a baby together! That’ll be a baby with a porn heritage and a half!
His theme night will be showing on televisionX next Friday (that’s September 12) from 10:30pm onwards so clear your diaries now, boys and girls! And guys, word to the wise: this is a great incentive to get your ladies watching tvx with you so be prepared to put up with your girly going on about how hot he is!

Exclusive News: Jobs For The Boys

You know I like to give you all a heads-up before stuff kicks off and today I have a corker for you. There’s this totally amazing new show starting next week and it looks so cool! It’s called Jobs For The Boys and it’s got Clarke Kent in it. The first episode starts next Thursday (11-9) at 10pm so it’s worth tuning in!
The basic premise of the show (I love it when porn shows have a ‘premise’) is “the ultimate job, the dream job. These lucky lads must get all the babes falling at their feet - what a life." Each episode is a dream job from a different decade so the first episode is set in the ‘40’s and Clarke is Lord Spitroast, a war-time fighter pilot. He gets tortured by his arch-nemesis, the evil villainess Vespa Deville, who’s played by Claudia Rossi (she’s a hot Slovakian babe).
There’s a little free clip you can watch on the televisionX homepage. It’s the middle one, in between Jim Slip and Girlz With Attitude. Check it out, it’s awesome!

Sweater Kittens

I love different words for tits. Sweater kittens is definitely my new favourite. Although, blatantly a girl made that one up! Here’s my little list and thoughts on them.

Love puppies: it’s okay, but a bit old hat now.

Boobs: that’s more of a word that girls use when referring to their own, or friends tits.

Jugs and hooters is too American for my liking.

Mammaries is a bit too clinical isn’t it.

Knockers is a great word. Classic, you can’t go wrong.

Funbags is okay but it’s a bit boring isn’t it.

Tit’s was one of George Carlin’s (he’s not only an amazing stand-up but he was also Rufus in Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure) ‘Seven Dirty Words You Can’t Say On Television’, along with ‘shit’, ‘fuck’ and ‘piss’. It’s weird to think of a time when these sort of words just wouldn’t be heard, although, this was the early ‘70s, and porn wasn’t exactly all that then either! I struggle to think of ‘tits’ as a word that people would find offensive. (And no, I don’t think “nice tits love” counts as offensive!)

Breasticles, melons, mounds, baps, norks, rack, whatever you wanna call ‘em, they are awesome. One of the things I personally think girls should appreciate more about porn is that not every pornstar has enhanced breasts. Yes, there’s a lot, I’m not going to deny that, but there’s loads of FIT and HOT girls that don’t have chesticles to rival Cathy Barry and that is okay.

However, any serious discussion about tits cannot go without a Busty Brits mention and lucky for you lot, Busty Brits Abroad 4 is now online! Watch Hannah prancing about the poolside flaunting her giant rack and then get mercilessly banged by Christian. What a brilliant way to end a Thursday!

Michelle B reveals all

Well there’s still time to quiz the busty and beatific Michelle B about anything you want. I’m still a fan of my “how many dicks can you fit in you at once?” question, but only because I’d like to see it actually happen. Hmm, what are some other good ‘uns?
“What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever used to masturbate with?”
That might be quite a good one. I’ve had girlfriends in the past admit to all sorts of kinky things besides the usual electric toothbrush confessions.
… Sorry, I faded out there, thinking about that haha! Go ask her a question NOW ‘cos this comp isn’t on for much longer!

Virgins

So, it’s the beginning of September, which is a time of year that inevitably makes me think of school. There was this blonde girl that was in my tutor group and she was one of the most popular girls in school. She was a total bitch to the other girls but she was popular because she was sporty and fit in that chavvy way that was in the in-thing during the mid ‘90s. You could always tell the popular kids at my school; they were the one in nike air-max while the rest of us plebs were in plimsolls.
Anyway, to bring me to my actual point: this girl was the first girl in my school year to lose her virginity. I’m not going to say when, but be sure, it was pretty early as she was a dirty slag. It was a total watercooler moment. Everyone knew about it, and literally everyone was talking about it. According to Durex, worldwide the average age for losing your virginity is 17.3! Does make you wonder what the average porn virginity is. I don’t mean what age your average pornstar lost his/her virginity but what the age they got into porn. Check out these two porn newbies banging for the first time on camera. I’ve got a sneaking suspicion that it’s not their first time in front of a camera as such (hometapes, anyone?) as they seem to know where to look and where to angle their bodies to get the best look. The best thing about this vid is not that they’re really attractive but that they look like normal people and yet they don’t seem amateur. They literally could be you or me! I’m a bit of a secret fan of the Hardcore Virgins series. You’ve just gotta love someone trying something out for the first time, pornstars or not!

Sybian lovin'

Apparently Howard Stern has his own sybian machine. He got it for his birthday. I don’t think there are many men who’s genuinely appreciate getting a sybian, other than him. They are pretty pricey ($1315!) and what exactly is a man gonna do with it?? Howard Stern invites women on his radio show to use it so I guess he’s got a decent reason for owning one.

Dr G Spot also has a pretty damn good reason for owning one. Out of all the girls I’ve seen lured to his ‘surgery’, I do think Judy is one of the hottest. He’s quite a lucky fucker really, when you think about it. All these hot girls turning up on his doorstep found his add somewhere, so some ugly bint could have found it not, these hot nubile young things.

Judy has great tits and she looks awesome flailing about on Dr G Spot’s equipment. Definitely worth a watch on a rainy Tuesday!

Why being a teenager was great

Another Monday morning, another heavy weekend. I’m feeling a bit delicate this morning after a very heavy Saturday night. I’ve decided it’s actually not fair that despite having slept all day yesterday I still feel like a one-man-sketchathon today. Seriously, what happened to the days of being young and carefree and being able to drink cider until the sun came up and not feel like utter shit for three days afterwards. Now, whenever I go out, I look at all these kids drinking gallons of beer in pubs and feel twinges of jealousy, knowing that if I tried to do that I’d be incapacitated for an entire week! Have I drunk through all of my quota of hang-over-free-passes? Probably.
So today is a day of celebrating being young, getting fucked up and getting fucked. I’m a big fan of the Naked City series and the new hardcore episode that’s been uploaded to the site is no exception. Emily has a very fresh-faced innocence to her and she just looks totally natural. She does seem a bit nervous to be honest but I think she is actually loving it. Give her a couple more shoots and she’ll be banging like a seasoned pro. Check her sucking off Ian Tate in this amazing video. I’m off to drown myself in caffeine!

Tattoos and piercings

Pierced fannies are one thing you know, a bit ten to the dozen in porn, but other piercings are still a bit unusual. This is why I like girls like Shay Hendrix and Havana. These girls like to show a bit of individuality.

Shay’s got this really unique piercing on her face, just under her eye that I think it’s quite cool, if only because it makes her stand out. Also in her Bitch In A Box episode she’s got her lip pierced and it looks pretty hot!

Havana on the other hand, is just out and out rock chick. The girl is covered in tattoos and piercings. She’s got her septum pierced and I don’t normally like on girls but she’s makes up for it by having her nipple pierced. She’s got lovely pert and natural tits. I, for one, hope they stay that way. Don’t get me wrong I fucking love big tits (enhanced or not) but on a girl as slight as Havana, her tits really suit her frame and look amazing on her.

I reckon we’ll end up with a few more girls like this as time goes on. My thinking is that these girls are pretty adventurous with their bodies, who knows what limits they could take their porn to?? Well, I look forward to seeing the bright careers they have ahead of them.

Anyway, I’m hungover and I’m sloping off back to bed to nurse my pounding head.

Girlz Girlz Girlz

So I gave you all a heads-up about this a while ago but I think another reminder is in order. Tonight is the premiere of the first episode of Girlz With Attitude at 10pm! I’ve already watched it ‘cos I’m off out tonight and it’s a corker. Havana is smoking hot and watching her and Lala get up to cock-based-mischief is a brilliant way to spend a Saturday evening in. I can’t wait to see the next episode as I heard on the grapevine that Jay Snake’s in it! I literally can’t wait to see Havana slide down all nine and half inches. Ooh that’ll be one of my eleven-a-day right there.
So watch this free clip, yes, that’s right, I said FREE CLIP! All my non-subscribing readers can actually watch some of the porn I recommend woo! However be aware that as soon as the full-length hardcore version goes up (which I hope it does soon!) this free clip won’t be available anymore, so enjoy it while it lasts.

Michelle B Answers My, Er, I Mean Your Questions

I’ve been flooding Michelle’s inbox with questions but I know I’ve got no hope of winning a signed photo. Something to do with working here bans me from entering competitions. Rubbish. Still, doesn’t stop me from actually asking the questions. My best question I thought of is: do you like quadruple penetration? 2 in each hole. Brilliant.
Go ask her a question. Try and better my question if you can!

Pin-up girls, Sailors and Pilots

So we’re at the end of our four-day week and to be honest with you I am knackered. I reckon I’ll just stay in tonight, put my feet up and settle in for the Carmel theme night tonight. Don’t worry though, I’m not staying in all weekend. Tomorrow I’m going to a burlesque night. Quite a few of my girl-mates do it and I love it. It provides me with a way to ogle my mates’s tits in a safe environment. In fact, if you think about it, they actively encourage you to stare at their tits. C’mon, nipple tassels and the ability to spin them are asking you to look! Anyway my friend is performing at an event tomorrow put on by Corset and Diamonds and I’m well excited as she’s proper good at burlesque.

I love the effort these girls go to with their costumes. They all look so glamorous, even when they’re almost naked. That’s why I love I Worship Pantyhose. All the girls go to amazing lengths with their outfits despite the fact they get ripped off but I think that’s the whole fun of dressing up. Watch Cate Harrington and Lolly Badcock rip their clothes right off each other for rimming and dildo fun. Best way to end a Friday work day!

Spunk On My Face

There’s this great game doing the rounds in the office at the moment which we’ve popped on the site so all you lucky souls can have a bash too. We all love a good facial cumshot and this games give you the opportunity to spunk in as many girls faces as possible. Every so often a set of tits goes past and you get more points for spunking on them. I did okay, no top score or anything, but still passable. My highest score was 33 but I think the only score I saved was 32. See if you can beat my score though!

For those that prefer actual spunk on girls faces, check out my favourite facial cumshots ever in numerical order (I spent a lot time working out my faves okay!)
3. Suzie Best in Horny Porno Slut just cos she’s a superhero with cum all over her chops.
2. Shay Hendrix underneath what seems like a mini-spunk fountain in Dirty Dogging.
1. Renee Richards almost getting her eyelashes glued shut with jizz in her episode of Babespotting.

Laugh your clothes right off

Four day weeks are awesome aren’t they. We’re half-way through and to celebrate I want you all to have a giggle on me. The latest televisionX Factor video made me almost piss my pants today when I watched it. Quote of the day has to go to Phil Barry who heads up Pumpkin Films, “I would suggest laying off the pies” said to a fattie porn hopeful! Absolute genius! My favourite thing about this episode has to be the actual porn stars they snuck in. Suzie Best, bless her, makes a good star turn in this episode. Let’s be fair, there’s no mistaking her northern voice and pert little bum! The funniest bit of the whole episode is watching Suzie’s face when she’s sat next to the naked pensioner. I won’t spoil it for you bit this old grandad is raring to go in some pretty kinky underwear.
Anyway, don’t worry I’m not trying to make you watch GILF porn (for the uninitiated that’s ‘Gran/Grandad I’d Like to Fuck’ because luckily Keni “hasn't had much experience with the opposite sex” Styles comes in to save the day. His trousers are so far up his waist I worry he’s doing damage to that prodigious, erm, talent, of his.
Watch it, it will beat away any mid-week blues (comedown/mammoth hangover) you might have!

Pregnant Pornstars

So I was pissing about on myspace on my lunchbreak when I read the most unbelieveable bulletin! Jenna Jameson, one of the most famous pornstars of all time is pregnant! Now I know she retired at the beginning of this year but how often do pornstars retire only to get back into biz not long after? I always thought the concept of pornstars retiring was a bit like superheros dying. I mean how often did Jean Grey of the X-men die only to come back to life??
I guess now she’s up the duff that’ll be it for her. Lot of behind the camera work. Hopefully she’ll be one of those great working mums and put her porn expertise to good use directing future generations of hot porn stars.
Part of me hopes she gets a sexy midwife like Tequila Woods in this episode of Dogging Diaries and can’t help but getting a bit girl-on-girl filthy with her nurse. Yes I know this is an elaborate fantasy but a mole can dream you know. Apparently some women get even hornier when they’re preggers and you never know this may even inspire her to come out of retirement. Give Josephine James a run for the money in the pregnant pornstar stakes!

Bank holiday blues

Ahh sweet lie-in. I got blotto last night as is traditional of a Sunday before bank holiday Monday so you can imagine how much I’m suffering today. I do not want to go back into work tomorrow. So I’m gonna have a jazz day today. That’s the perfect way to prepare for going back after a long weekend. I’m gonna bust out my copy of Headhunters by Herbie Hancock. It’s one of my fav albums by him and it’s a great way to relax. In fact it almost makes it feel like a Sunday!
So back to work tomorrow and I might get up early and start the morning with this little Lolly vid. Lust, Lingerie and Lolly. My oh my, it’s a cracker and funnily enough there’s a bit of jazz in it! Enjoy, boys and girls.

Ask Michelle B anything

I love Metallica. I wish I was watching them at Reading Festival tonight but I couldn’t even get a day ticket. I’ve been to Reading a few times; ‘s alright but I deffo prefer Glastonbury. Reading is just full of emos and teenaged headbangers throwing bottles of piss at each other. No thanks! Luckily I found out that Metallica are playing a special ‘retro-priced’ gig that only costs a fiver! How brilliant is that! Apparently it’s a charity gig at the O2 around mid-september. I’ll be booking tickets as soon as I finish writing this!
So, in the words of Sesame Street, today’s letter is the letter ‘M’. Which leads me seamlessly from Metallica to Michelle B. We’re running a little competition at the moment where you can ask the lovely Michelle B whatever you want. If she answers your question it will be featured on the website and you win a signed photo! Hurray! No doubt plenty of people of people will ask how big her tits are, what’s her favourite position etc etc, so I’m going to spend the rest of the afternoon rather productively thinking up quirky questions for her!

Rise Of The Machines

BAD: Cylons. Humanity’s children. So like humanity, in fact, that we consider them inherently evil. For those not inducted in geeky ways I’m talking about Battlestar Galatica. I bought the box set of the remake series 1-3 yesterday and I’m working my way through it this weekend. It’s ace. I already watched it all as it was airing on Sci Fi but it’s nice to go back and watch it again as you pick up little bits you missed the first time round. I don’t know if anyone’s seen this little video that was doing the rounds between series 3 and 4 but I think it’s genuinely hilarious. It’s mostly about those people who obsess about finishing every aspect of a video game (Achievement Whores) but there’s a brilliant bit in there about ‘Spoiler Whores’. I won’t spoil it (haha) but you should definitely watch it.

GOOD: Pneumatic dildos. God’s gift to women. And porn lovers. Not that I can imagine having one of these bad-boys in my basement for the wife (I’m not married, I’m just imagine a high-tech sexified future). It would have to be in the basement though, wouldn’t it. Not quite the sort of contraption you want kicking around the bedroom. Hmm, I do sometimes feel like I’m living in the future (btf 2 hoverboards aside) like when you’re coming up the escalators on the underground and it’s got all those video billboards. Things like that make me feel like it’s the future. Things like Rise of The Machines make it feel like I stepped into a future penned by William Gibson.
Not that good old Lolly minds getting either sets of lips round these arousing automatons. And that, my friends, is all that matters at the end of the day.
Mole out.